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Practicum : Day 59, July 28th

When I woke up this morning, I never knew today would actually be quite an okay day. The reason why I thought it wouldn't was all because of the observation from Dr.Siva. I guess I was too stricken with fear and overwhelmed with excessive nervous hormones (is there such a thing?) that I couldn't even sleep well last night. Seriously, I couldn't. I didn't slept well at all last night. And actually, I was not even feeling sleepy that much. I forced myself to feel sleepy by watching a movie last night in hopes that I might fell asleep while doing so but I didn't. I stayed awake until the end of the movie and still wasn't able to sleep later on. I lied down on the bed, play the softest and the most harmonious and melodious songs I've had in my laptop in hopes that it'll lullaby me to sleep and wrapped myself with the blanket.
And the result was that after half an hour doing so, I finally manages to fall asleep. But it wasn't quite a well-rested sleep at all because I woke up every hour and so still feeling uneasy. Finally, I decided to wake up after the call from my phone (alarm) and do some warming up to make me feel energized since I didn't have a good night sleep after all.

Next, I went to cook some dishes for my lunch today because I have no more money in wallet. Although I'm not complaining about cooking but recently, I am feeling quite uneasy staying in my uncle's house for free and slouching off to much. I realized that I'm not exactly a good nephew because I'm not that much of clean person because I seldom help them clean the house, let alone impress them with the condition of the room that I'm staying in because I'm telling you that it is more or so like my room in the rental house in Taman Ilmu, all dusty and messy. I'm not trying to pull any excuses here but I know that I can be very lazy sometimes.

Anyway............ my observation with Dr.Siva today didn't quite actually sucked that much because considering the grade that he gave me, I was already in high gratitude because he commented quite a lot of things about my lesson plan and its execution. I can remember some of the comments, such as :

- my voice projection was not LOUD enough. (that, for me was a bit questionable because I thought that I've spoke as loud as I could)
- I'm not walking here and there a lot in the class but more or less standing still too much in front of the class
- my lesson stages are not directly or properly linked
- my presentation stage was messy and unorganized 
- grammar mistakes on the exercises
- wrong usage of words to represent people who can't talk (supposedly the word is dumb people > referring to people who can't talk, but I used 'mute' instead because I thought that if I were to used 'dumb', it would sound a bit far-fetched and it might hurt other people)
- production stage was not really a production stage (I did comprehension exercises because for me, that's the best kind of production that the students could opt to do as they're not exactly an average proficient learner)

....and a few more which I can't remember. I've jotted all it down in my notebook but I left it at the school and I could only remember these few. But considering all these comments, I am grateful enough for the grade that he had given me. I'm not complaining and I will take what I get, no questions asked.

By the way, my observation was done with my 1C class and I'm glad that all of them are giving me their best behavior today. I'm thankful that they felt the necessity to show me some respect that I deserves as their teacher. Although I complain a lot about them for being so noisy and out of control, they are by far my funniest students and I love them a lot. Yes, I am being biased. Liking them more than my 1A class. But you can't blame me for doing so because they've been kind to me as I have to them.

Yes, they made me proud today and I hope they would make me even prouder come the next observation next week. Please be on your best behavior once more, my dearest 1C students. However, today, I got really mad at my 1A student. Not to all of them as general, but to particularly one student. He has been annoying me for quite some time already. He's not the naughty type like the other boys inside the class who didn't do my work but he's the most annoying boy ever. Yes, he is clever, but he's super annoying. Today, I got mad at him and scolded him in front of the whole class. The rest of the class stood still watching this predicament. I felt so sorry for blasting out on him, truthfully. I never wanted to hurt his feeling or anything but if I never did what I did today, I will never deserve the respect that I needed from him like what happened to his other classmate which is now a better student.

One more thing to talk about today. Well, not exactly today, but tomorrow. Tomorrow will be the final day where I get to eat inside the school because come Tuesday next week, I can no longer eat inside the school. Because on Monday (school holiday), is the first day of the fasting month and for the rest of the three weeks to come, there will be no more eating in school thus relaying me of the tagline which I've received from the teachers there:

"Kat mana ada makanan, kat situ MESTI ada Najmi!"

The thing about tomorrow is that the teachers are doing a pot luck feast where the teachers would pile up dishes they cook themselves to school in order to celebrate something. Tomorrow's pot luck is to celebrate two things. One, the starting of the fasting month, and secondly, to celebrate our future departure from the school which will happen on the 19th of August, which is still in the fasting month. Get what I meant? It will be kind of a pre-farewell pot luck for us trainee teachers. Since all of the teachers are cooking something and bringing it over, it would look bad on us if we did come empty-handed just to eat, so I decided to ask Tini to make her Bread Pudding and bring it over tomorrow. We've bought the ingredients earlier tonight and cooked it already and left to cool inside the fridge. By tomorrow's afternoon, it would be perfect to be eaten.

....and I can't wait to eat all of the foods and dishes that the teachers cook tomorrow!!!!

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